Who’s running the show? You’re inner kiddo or CEO?

Eye to Eye with a Quoll.

I sat outside on my deck, enjoying some winter sun, deep in thought when BAM a ‘Quoll’ jumped up, right in front of me. We were eye to eye. I stayed completely still, in awe, then took a photo when I saw his leg injury. The Quoll seemed to be looking at me and but was likely sniffing me or food out in the air. I phoned Wires (The Wildlife Rescue service here) and kept an eye out to see if he would come back. He hasn’t as far as I know, despite leaving food and water out and I’m unlikely to see him again. I guessed he was hungry as they’re rare to see at all, let alone in the middle of the day.

This was an unusual privilege. I’ve learnt that when certain things appear there may be a message or meaning that can go deeper, not always! but I like to check anyway. I looked up any information about the Quoll. A couple of things jumped out, the quoll is fast and takes action, they’re completely independent at 18 weeks and this one was hungry.

The hungry kiddo

I wrote about my thoughts in an online group ‘The Academy’ with Tanya Geisler – amazing work and brilliant coach! Tanya intuitively mentioned something about my ‘hungry kiddo’ and those words had an emotional hit for me. I remembered receiving the ‘Greedy Ganit’ award as a kid in a ‘Brownie’ camp (the pre-cursor to Girl Guides that I never got to). I won that award because I always went back for second helpings of food and despite being a skinny kid was often hungry. This was partly due to an unwell parent who wasn’t able to cook much and partly due to filling an emotional ‘gap’ that had been created from early childhood trauma.

The inner CEO

I decided to dig a little deeper with Nicole Lewis-Keeber, a therapist and coach, who introduced me to the term ‘Inner Kiddo’. We had an ‘Inner CEO’ session and uncovered more. Mainly that success for me in the past has equalled burnout and that asking for help doesn’t come easily… does anyone else have trouble with that? My ‘inner rebel kiddo’ would like to have full control and do it HER way on her own. She was understandably trying to regain control, not wanting anyone to ‘own’ her.

This fierce independence and strength can also be a gift if we’re not running our lives by these unconscious drivers. Using our strength and fierceness as a positive force in the world, instead of a destructive ongoing presence. For me, the Quoll also brought this medicine and message.

Nicole’s work encourages us to bring on board all the inner kiddo’s. Mine might be the angry rebellious one, the sensitive one, the hungry one, the funny one, the caring one. At the same time bringing in my wise loving ‘older’ soul. The ‘fairy godmother’ that lives inside me too. What I’d been missing was asking for help from my wise soul to talk with my inner kiddo.

Now, I’ve spent a lot of time with my inner wise soul and I listen in daily, there’s not a lot of room for inner critics and negativity. My ‘fairy godmother’ handles all of this wonderfully, along with some amazing friends!

My inner ‘fairy godmother’

However, I didn’t think to ask my ‘wise soul’ for help with my inner kiddo! As Nicole said, she needs to be asked. Sometimes we forget that.

How do we ask? The way I’d approach this is to create a ‘sacred’ container and tune into the feeling of that inner kiddo. Then bring in the energy and presence of my loving wise self. This would usually be in meditation. Then I’d create a scene in my mind where they can talk with each other. Along with journaling about what I see and then take it from there. And, keep checking in, particularly before making a life decision or business leap. I want to make sure we’re all on board without leaving anyone behind that’s not happy!

Simple awareness has power

Also, simple awareness has power. Bringing something new into our conscious minds is potent. I often find that things shift in day to day life from this new awareness. We can’t unknow what we know to be a truth inside us. Truth has a resonance and once you know what that feeling is you can’t unknow it. It’s up to us whether we choose to live from that truth or push it to the back of our minds, again. It’s also influenced by the resources, readiness and support we have available at the time.

We miss the good stuff when we numb out the bad

I know most if not all of us numb out in some way. It’s hard to hear our truth in a busy mind and there are plenty of ways we bypass what we’re really feeling. The problem is when we numb out what we don’t want to feel then we also tend to numb out the loving voice, the caring ‘wise soul’ who has our back and can be a source of wise counsel if we listen. Yoga and Meditation can help us be more at ease with our thoughts and feelings and a good therapist can hold space and offer guidance and understanding, vital support, especially when we don’t have the skill or resources to name or understand what is happening.

Who’s in the driver seat?

Nicole is a trained therapist who has years of experience working with both small and big ‘T’ (trauma). She brings this experience into her work with business owners in creating an emotional sustainability plan.

All the hard work, marketing or productivity training will only get us so far if there’s an ‘inner kiddo’ in the driver seat. They’re always going to take us to their destination which is unlikely to be where we intended.

Emotional sustainability plan

Creating an emotional sustainability plan is something Nicole helps business owners develop in her ‘Love your Business School’. She has a free business relationship assessment here, and if you’re a Brené Brown fan, you’re in luck as Nicole is certified by Brené to run ‘Dare to Lead’ workshops.

Tending to my ‘inner kiddo’

Meanwhile, I’ll be tending to my inner kiddo and diving more deeply into the work I love and cherish. I’m planning an online program that takes a deep dive into ‘aligning with your truth’ through the body, mind, soul and energy system – hop on my email list to be the first to know, or send me an email if this interests you. I’ll be offering a 4-week version of this from Monday 4th November. You’ll also receive a free yoga video and relaxation to download. If you’d prefer one-to-one mentoring, there are 2 spots left starting September and October.

Right now my hungry kiddo is wanting and loving daily Sauerkraut, not something I wanted as a kid! Let me know in the comments what your ‘inner kiddo’ is craving?

I really hope the Quoll was able to find enough food and healing too. I’ll no doubt be researching more and seeing how best to help these native marsupials thrive again. Here’s an organisation that is already helping to do just that. https://www.quolls.org.au/about.html

Have a wonderful week xo

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